Sister Sister

I love talking to the women in my life--truly a collection of the smartest and coolest people in the world--about everything, really, but a favorite topic is what unique qualities the bonds between women possess, and how much of it is forged in the fires of a patriarchal society. Relationships between women are complex, crucial, formative things. They leave indelible impressions, make us who we are, inform how we see ourselves, how we understand the world, and who we are in it. Though I hardly need a special occasion to marvel over how amazing women are, August 4th nonetheless delivers unto us National Sisters' Day, an opportunity to take a moment to contemplate the depth and complexity of the sisterhood relationship in all its forms.

Googling sisterhood lands you in a few obvious places: inspirational quotes; sorority sisters going off about their bonds with one another; mentions of nunneries; GIFs of Serena and Blair from Gossip Girl; traveling pants; Ya-Ya; witches. Merriam-Webster offers this one: "[a]n association, society, or community of women linked by a common interest, religion, or trade," which is a bit dry, but I'm down with "a belief in or feeling of unity and cooperation among women," and things headed in that direction, the mortar of which is a slurry of unity and cooperation and love. The bricks on the other hand, as many of us know, are quite a different story, and not so easy to put into soft, Glamour Shots-like focus.

We Have Always Lived in the Castle -- Shirley Jackson

Shirley Jackson struggled with her mental health and a husband who couldn't stand that her genius eclipsed his - a witchy outsider whose inspiration for her breathlessly anthologized story The Lottery was the time she spent at Bennington College in Vermont and how much she hated it. Did Merricat Blackwood kill her entire family? Was her sister Constance always baking something elaborate and sad? Does sisterhood here mean covering up for your semi-feral little sister's misdeeds and protecting her from angry villagers? Yes! That's fierce love.

The Neapolitan Novels -- Elena Ferrante 

No one quite captures the love/admiration/jealousy/competition/forever-seeking cocktail of energy that laces its way through so many female friendships like Elena Ferrante. In The Neapolian’s Novels, this is all played out against a mid-20th century Naples, in which these two girls who begin their lives from the very same circumstances become Ferrante's way of unspooling the thought experiment of nature vs. nurture, life trajectories vs. raw material. But at no point are these novels doing any less than brimming with heart and intelligence and incisive psychological insight. The plot turns as much on class as it does the choices one makes in the presence or absence of these class-based restrictions. Italian woman, written pseudonymously.

How Should a Person Be? -- Sheila Heti 

As Elisa Albert puts it in her wild ride of a review: "It’s about women who fall in love with each other’s minds." It captures the murky, queer spaces women's friendships so often occupy; not necessarily romantic, but not purely platonic either. It's playful and brave and candid, and it's about art and the nature of being, when you have time to think and write and unpack all of that with your brilliant friend, who you might be in love with, across a table, until 2am. Searching for Missus Right, basically, by a Canadian white woman. If you're itching to unpack all of this yourself, a discussion of this title is coming upon on August 20th!

Sister Outsider -- Audre Lorde 

“Men who are afraid to feel must keep women around to do their feeling for them while dismissing us for the same supposedly "inferior" capacity to feel deeply. But in this way also, men deny themselves their own essential humanity, becoming trapped in dependency and fear.” 

Audre Lorde says it better than I ever possibly could, so why not let her speak for herself? Essential essays and speeches about race, gender, and class dynamics by one of our most cherished Black Lesbian Revolutionaries.

Housekeeping -- Marilynne Robinson

Two sets of sisters in this one! Both Ruth and Lucille, the main sisters, and their doddering but well-meaning great aunts, and another aunt, eccentric and isolated, named Sylvie. Some incredibly beautiful, spare, longing writing, set in a remote and frosty place called Fingerbone.

Cat's Eye -- Margaret Atwood 

Challenging childhood friendship dynamics in a similar mode to My Brilliant Friend, with a darker undercurrent. 

A piece about sisterhood and literature would be sorely incomplete without at least a passing mention of the Brontë Sisters. Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights, and Agnes Grey are masterpieces.

Lastly, a booklist created by another librarian, Erik Bobilin -- Bildungswomans  

Since I love talking and writing about books, which I basically do to anyone who will listen to me, I've also written even more about some of my selections for this book list (Shirley Jackson in particular) in the inaugural issue of Hysterical Rag, a humor-focused literary magazine for women, femmes, and non-binary folks I helped found with a couple of my dear sisters. Issue 2 will be out soon, and will feature still other sisters/friends/librarians! Stay tuned!